5 differences between true love and attachment

Do you really love that person or is it just a feeling of attachment when you're with them? Love is really complicated, but this article will explain to you the difference between true love and attachment. I hope that these explanations will help you nurture your current relationship or create a solid foundation for a true love in the future.

1. Love is altruistic, and attachment is selfish

When you love, you often focus on making the person feel happy. You can think of any way to ensure that your person always feels loved and cared for. You don't have to score points, argue about who helps anyone more, or scramble over who has to wash dishes. You do not intimidate him, always try to be gentle and find a way to dominate the relationship.

When you are merely being attached to a person, you only pay attention to how they make you happy and happy. You become dependent on that person and you will even control that person to avoid being left alone. Instead of dealing with your problems, you use that person to improve your self-esteem and fill the gap in your heart. You think that person must be responsible for your happiness, become irritable and frustrated if they don't satisfy you.

2. Love is freedom, attachment is in control

When two people love each other, you can always be yourself. He will help you know who you are and will not hesitate to reveal your weaknesses. Trust in each other is increasing and becomes a powerful catalyst for both personal development. Love never has control. In fact, love is out of control. Your lover accepts who you are and encourages you to pursue your dreams, allowing you to eliminate the need to control their lives.

In contrast, attachment tends to control each other's behavior. You may discourage the person from spending time with their friends, playing games or not caring about them. You even force them to be with you, no matter what your feelings are.

3. Love is developed together, attachment is entangled

When you love, both you and that person will grow together. Together, it is better to do everything together so that it is better for the person to do it alone. In short, your lover is the most powerful catalyst for your development and vice versa.

As for attachment, the desire to control and not be able to solve your own problems will limit your development as well as your partner. Unresolved problems are the cause of unnecessary dependency. It should come as no surprise that this hinders both their development and makes it difficult to love in a healthy way.

4. Love is eternal, and attachment is just a fleeting feeling

Love will survive over time . You and your partner can break up temporarily or permanently. However, if you really love that person will always hold an important position in your heart and you will continue to bless them for the rest of your life.

On the other hand, if you are merely a bond between two people, it is very likely that you will hold resentment after parting. You may even feel yourself betrayed. This feeling comes from the fact that you always assume that the person is responsible for your happiness, but in your eyes it is not met.

5. Love reduces ego, and attachment makes me ego

When you love, you never assume that you are the center. Your relationship reduces the self in you, helps you to improve yourself, be less selfish and love more. Your relationship is going to be a source of energy that makes both change in a positive way. Most importantly, both will bravely share each other's weaknesses and injuries that they have experienced and talk to each other with their hearts.

Besides, the relationship based on attachment is often dominated by ego. This is why many people constantly fall into unsatisfactory relationships, each relationship is related to each other and the problem of repeated mistakes is repeated. You find it difficult to recognize and solve your problems. This creates dependence on your relationship, creating a feeling of unhappiness when being with that person. You rely on other necessities to solve problems or at least that can help you forget them.

Currently, if you are not in love with the right person, I really hope that you can quickly find your partner and build a great relationship with that person. Wait until then, why don't you improve yourself better and love them more? Believe in the saying: " What you want, will definitely come to you ". If so, it is really wise to want to be someone who always attracts others.