13 key principles for a lasting, lasting love

Mark Manson, a well-known blogger and writer, has conducted a test of sustainable relationships in extremely interesting love. Mark Manson asked 1,500 people in love to share the secret of their sustainable relationship. The results made him feel surprised. Based on Mark's research results, the Bright Side page has drawn 13 important principles to create a lasting, lasting love . Invite you to consult!

1. There are realistic expectations and romance in relationships

Romeo and Juliet are not a love story. It was a meeting between a 13-year-old girl and a 17-year-old son, only for 3 days and 6 people died.

This shows that true love has a choice and sincerity, no matter how difficult the situation is. And romantic love is only a temporary thing, which is why today many people are often confused about love. When enthusiasm is gone, love will disappear forever.

In today's life, many people begin to love to make up for what they lack or they hate. This will create a dead end in love. Your feelings will become temporary, stomping on the spot until you need something together.

2. Being together for good reason

Mark asked the participants to test what they had done wrong before getting married. The answer that Mark received the most was " I am with her / him for the wrong reasons ". Such as:

1. Pressure from family or friends.
2. Feeling that you are a failure when you're alone or agreeing with someone to have someone with you.
3. Good relationships only " on the image ", and in fact not.
4. Young, innocent and full of affection that can conquer everything in the world.
5. Dreams can change with the other half.

3. Sustainable relationships do not require sacrifice

Sacrifice in love is probably obvious. You try to preserve a happy relationship by constantly sacrificing yourself for the other person. However, in order to make the relationship long-term, there must be two " sustainable " characters, meaning that two people must keep their own personalities. Not always sacrificed for the other half.

4. Need to respect each other while communicating

Most couples who have divorced for 10 to 15 years say that communication is the key to success. In contrast, couples who have been together for decades have always appreciated respect.

Conflict is inevitable in relationships, especially love. Only respect and trust can save your relationship. Moreover, you also have to respect yourself, because without this, it will make you feel that your feelings are not valuable, not to make your relationship better. Below is a demonstration of the proper behavior of happy couples:

1. Never say bad things about the other half in front of everyone. If you feel unhappy, confide in them.
2. Respect her / his privacy, especially his interests and ambitions.
3. Respect for voting. You two are a couple, so you two need to work together.
4. There is no secret between the two. If both are honest, honesty will continue.

5. Both will change beyond expectations, but please be happy

Couples next to each other for more than 20 years often pay attention to the change of the enemy over time. Therefore, you should be willing to accept the changes of your partner. That change is not about taste or insignificant things, but a radical change in life, possibly a religious perspective, moving to a new country, the departure of relatives, caring for family members, political views, even changes in sexual orientation.

6. Give each other private space

Couples interviewed by Mark often talk a lot about dividing bank accounts, friends, hobbies, vacations, etc. Some also recommend limiting room sharing. Because the more we love, the more likely we are to control the lives of our opponents. If it is not possible to give the opponent a separate space, the love will lose respect. [The more the message is, the more sustainable the relationship is.]

7. Ingenious in quarrels

When people talk about " good communication ", this means we have to face difficult conversations. Here are a few suggestions to help you become a lover who has an ingenious way of acting in a quarrel:

1. Do not have too high ego.
2. Don't repeat the previous story, just make things worse.
3. If too emotional, temporarily stop the conversation to calm down.
4. Remember that winning makes the enemy hurt, not at all.

8. Share everything, especially unhappy things

If there is something that makes you feel uncomfortable, be ready to share it with your partner / husband. Maybe that makes the other half feel hurt, but will help both build closer, more intimate relationships. Learn how to distinguish when a lover hides something from you. This is not easy, because you will have to face together to find the root of the root. However, it only happens when one side thinks everything is normal, while the other side thinks it is a problem.

9. Happiness is simple things

Don't forget the little things in life. Never forget. Say " I love you " or " I love you " holding hands, helping each other around chores in life. So simple, isn't it?

These things become even more important when both children have children. Hundreds of people think and say the same thing: prioritize your marriage life . Most of the interviewees said that couples should regularly hang out in shops, make plans for relaxation, relax on weekends and have time for each other. to improve relationships in just 60 seconds?]

10. Learn to forgive

When two different personalities live together, conflict will inevitably occur. Don't forget you shouldn't try to change your other half. Keep the difference and learn to love and forgive. The ideal partner is not absolutely perfect, but someone with mistakes that makes you happy to adjust together.

11. The "love" problem

Sex is like a " presidential speech ". If the relationship between the two is good, then the pillow is also smooth: both will voluntarily and enjoy the sweetness of love. Many love readers share that sex is not only complementary to their relationship, but also helps them both have new vitality.

12. It is reasonable to set principles in love

Each of us has a perfect view of good relationships: the enemy will have their own tasks that they can perform and balance the time when they are together and when they are alone. In fact, that is completely different. You may feel like you're talking to the wall. This is the reason no one is perfect, need to divide responsibility for each other. Find out your knack and department, and then make reasonable arrangements.

13. Learn how to " surf "

There was a nurse who shared with Mark the story of an 80-year-old man. He has a long-term relationship with a single woman. The original text is as follows:

" Relationships are like waves: all ups and downs, và không phải là một kích cỡ thứ tự. , earn and lose lots of money. None of these waves are forever, and, in the end, you'll always stay together . "

Temporarily translate:

"The relationship is like the waves: at times, down and without a peaceful moment. It is important to understand the waves and understand the value of the relationship. People We will sometimes lose our jobs, witness the departure of our loved ones, relocate, change jobs, earn or lose a lot of money, these waves are not forever, and finally, both will always together . "

Mark's end-of-book afterword and reader Margo:

" Bạn có thể làm việc với sự kiện như long như bạn không thể thực hiện mỗi khác. Never shame hoặc mock mỗi khác hoặc mà làm việc làm việc làm việc làm việc làm việc làm việc với bạn, và đọc nó every year của bạn (hay thêm thường). Ghi nhớ các ký tự để mỗi khác.

Khi bạn có chúng, có người này này không có khi khi làm việc xác thực cho tình trạng. Không nhận ra yêu cầu mà đã thêm conception. It'll teach your children love. Your spouse is always number one. You'll each grow, so be one to encourage this growth. Không phụ thuộc vào đối tượng để xác định relationship.

Love your partner the way they are, even khi bạn upset. Trust each other. Giving each benefit of doubt. Be honest. Take pride in each khác. Không mở được thay đổi, và nhận mới. Print this out, và đọc nó EVERY DAY. "

Temporarily translate:

" You can do everything as long as you don't ruin the other half. Never embarrass or mock each other to make the other half happy. Write down the reasons why you fall in love with the other half and read it again. Every time you celebrate (or regularly read them) Write love letters to each other.

Once you have children, you will be 'crazy' when they become the only reason you want to live. So never forget the love that brought you children. This will help you teach your children how to love. Partner is always number one. Both of you will grow up, so be the one who encourages this growth. Don't rely too much on others to maintain relationships.

Love when they are themselves, even when you are sad. Mutual trust. Give each other the benefits of doubt. Honest. Be proud of each other. Open your heart to change and accept new things. Print this paragraph and read it every day. "

Refer to some more articles:

1. Math proves: 26 years old is the best time to get married!
2. Love consists of 5 stages but most of us have to give up at the 3rd stage
3. 5 differences between true love and attachment

Having fun!