You are only 23, do not live urgently!

Once, I asked the boss "what can I do to be better?" . The boss answered that this is the 4th time I asked this question during the month. Although he appreciated my efforts in improving and developing myself, he also advised me to be patient. Whenever I ask him for feedback on projects that have been successful in the past, he always says that I have accomplished an outstanding task and if I continue to maintain that momentum, I will do even better.

I thought it was the worst feedback I've ever received. I don't want to be "fine". I want to be more wonderful, better, more impressive and generally more than what I have. It is almost an insult to think that I am "fine" because then I find myself too trivial.

One of my goals is to become the most foolish person in the room so that I can reach out to extremely intelligent people and learn from them. That's how I grow fastest. Accidentally, this also made me start to compare myself with them.

You are only 23, do not live urgently! Picture 1

The boss sold the company worth millions of dollars when he was 28 years old. My product manager has also established many companies and then resold them to others when he was only 25 - older than I am currently 2 years old. Day after day, I worked with these two very intelligent and talented people. I asked myself, what did I do? If when I was their age, would I have been as successful as they were?

The stories of Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and many other founders in their 20s are making their mark on the world creating an impulse for us - all of us Millenial people with too much ambition. And countless other stories tell us that there is no better time than now - when you are young, just graduated from college and have nothing to lose - it is impossible to stop us from craving. Don't wait until you have family, collateral, responsibilities or things like that . That's what resounded in my head. That feeling made me impatient. I obsessed. I want to grow up and create value as soon as possible.

I want to achieve my goals faster. I want to be tomorrow, I have to be different. I want to learn everything so that I can create value. We all have 24 hours a day and I force myself to take every minute to work most effectively. If I eat breakfast, I will watch a video about career on Udemy; If I'm on the move, I listen to the podcast; If I'm waiting for the bus, I read the newspaper on Pocket; If I do nothing, I feel like I'm backing away from others.

I remember a few months ago when I came back from Valley (Siliconon) - where many people told me that if I wanted to study as fast as I could while I was working in technology, I needed to move there. . More opportunities, more resources, more talents and more growth opportunities. It is very meaningful."Anyone who wants to be an actor should go to LA, anyone who wants to start a business / develop a technology idea should go to SF." A friend said it to me because there are so many opportunities in the Valley, people learn and grow faster and if I don't go now, I will lag behind. That scared me. I do not want to be inferior to friends. I almost prepared everything to start.

You are only 23, do not live urgently! Picture 2

When I returned to Toronto, I thought about it a little more. Why do I really want to go to SF? Is that really what I want? And I realized that while my career ambition is important, family, self-development and balance are just as important.

Surprisingly, after coming to SF, I almost felt guilty about wanting to create value too soon. I find myself 23 years old - a great time in my life, I should maximize what I have and give myself the opportunity to build the foundation for my future success.

I feel ashamed of my urgency to feel wrong now when I choose.

No one told me that I was wrong to have a balance between finance and life at only 23 years old. "Culture obsessed with productivity" combined with the sense of urgency created judgment."You MUST work in a technology environment - where the agile model is growing, speed and scale are always at the forefront. In this world, if you don't move quickly, you can't cope. with other opponents ". All are imposition.

So, I started treating myself as a "never knew" person.

You are only 23, do not live urgently! Picture 3

I spent 3 hours sitting in Indigo after work, picking a book and reading it from beginning to end. I don't remember the last time I read books and I didn't know what prompted me to do so. But the feeling was great. That very interesting book helped me forget my current situation and my mind was also comfortable. I forced myself to finish reading it even though the sound in my head reminded me that I had 1000 other things to worry about and accomplish.

And guess? What happens. Nothing. I am fine.

Is that productivity? Does it waste time? Of course not! What will I do in the future? I do not know. But even if I don't know anything, I'm fine. As long as I have learned something and I have created some value for someone's life today is still a great day.

I am only 23 years old and yes, in 2 years, I will go ¼ of the century. I still have three-quarters of a century to learn and create more value. That's 657,000 now I can do what I want in life.

So you are only 23. Don't live too fast, don't live too fast. Slow down a bit to feel your youth and find that you have a lot of other things to do. Accept progress slowly to learn more and build a solid foundation for your future.