Why the more friends we feel the more lonely?

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The sad thing is that chronic loneliness is becoming a difficult epidemic in today's society. We are living in a busy and busy time. It is too normal to sacrifice relationships to follow work, money and more. But as a species, people cannot live alone and develop their own abilities well. We will grow best when we gather in groups, organizations where we can rely on others to seek support and empathy.

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Despite the instinct of human instincts, the percentage of Americans who say they often feel lonely is at a very high level. In the 1970s and 1980s, this proportion corresponds to about 11-20% of the US population feeling lonely. However, in 2010, the American Association of Retired Persons (AARP ) conducted a similar study and the rate skyrocketed to 45%.

When the feeling of loneliness invades our entire people, our instincts change to integrate with society, to make more friends, but we realize that this loneliness is increasingly invasive. .

So why the more friends we feel the more lonely? Please join us in this article!

1. Loneliness still exists even when there are friends around

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Alone is not synonymous with loneliness . Imagine a specific situation like this: in family reunion, your relatives sit together but they just take care of using the phone, surfing Facebook or texting someone. In this situation, they are not alone, they focus on sitting together but they are creating a germ for loneliness. They pay more attention to the phone than the people sitting next to them, they have completely forgotten the true connection between people.

Another example that you can easily imagine is the patients in the hospital. Although these patients are well cared for, they still feel lonely and neglected if relatives do not visit them often. With this situation, whether it is a person or an animal, it will feel very lonely, like I have been forgotten by the whole world.

2. Connecting with each other is easy but it is difficult to tighten up new feelings

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Part of the problem of becoming ' super society ' or finding new friends to fill the gap in yourself is actually a meaningless connection. The reason is simply because you need to connect with new people.

Whenever you open an app like Facebook or SnapChat, you can connect with people. They can be long-term friends, acquaintances or even uninformed people, but the remarkable thing here is the ambiguous boundary between real friends and " virtual " friends on the social network. Assembly A person can have thousands of friends on Facebook but only really know 50 of them. Having lots of friends doesn't mean you're not alone.

Another lonely resolution trend is dating apps. If you want to change your mood or simply want someone to praise you and be friends with you, any dating app can meet your needs in just a few minutes.

Usually, this type of friendship has no constraints; It does not pose any danger to you, but it still has the disadvantage of being emotionally detrimental to you. You will not feel lonely when talking to that person but when the person leaves ( usually will never come back ) you will feel more lonely than before.

See also: 10 things "true" friends never do

3. Creating indiscriminate relationships is the bad habit of lonely people

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When you want to make new friends because you feel so lonely, that's when you're making friends indiscriminately. Even if the word ' indiscriminately ' is often used to talk about romantic relationships, dating or familiarity by accident, this alternative definition is no different when it comes to the person you are close to. Here, making friends too easy without caring about who the person is is considered indiscriminately.

It is true that you will find it more satisfying to be associated with many people, but new connections do not always become sustainable relationships.The more superficial friendship you have, the more lonely you feel.

Try to remember the last time you found yourself craving food so badly. Perhaps you will eat what you find in the refrigerator even if they are not good snacks. It is similar to trying to have superficial and superficial relationships to fill loneliness. When you are not interested in choosing who to join, you will only gain superficial ' friendship '.

4. Resist the "addiction" to make friends when you want to escape loneliness

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Deep relationships connect people at a very high level of intimacy. When you really have a relationship with a person, you will put your trust in that person. That belief will allow you to share your thoughts and feelings so that you can grow like a real person.

However, superficial, superficial relationships often lead to the most fundamental problem of all relationships: ' The separation of a beloved companion '. As a result, loneliness is formed and growing. You will feel distant because thoughts and emotions are not exchanged and shared. So why should you share your thoughts and opinions with someone else if you don't know if they can keep you secret?

Lonely people often fall into a vicious circle full of dangers: they feel lonely, they try to get to know many people and make friends with people who are not suitable and then become more lonely. That is why there is a saying: ' It is better to have two soulmates delivered than 20 acquaintances .'

What do you have to do then? No more friendly? No way.

5. Stop trying to find many friends

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Try to connect with a few friends that you can really share with them. The biggest goal is to build real relationships based on a solid foundation . If you love diamond bracelets but don't qualify, you'd rather not wear a cheap fake bracelet that turns your wrist blue. So are the fake ' friends '.

Another important thing to note is that friendship and relationships with people should be done for yourself and your happiness, not to impress others or make yourself a celebrity. .Someone may have a lot of friends but still feel lonely. It doesn't matter how many people are impressed by your group if you don't consider the people in that group to be really your friends.

Finding the right friend gives you warmth and harmony in your soul. Every time you feel lonely, just sending a message to a person or two close friends will help you feel better. Real friends are people who will make us feel happy and help us grow.

Find out the 3 types of friends you should have in your life. If you feel a bit surprised about how to find real relationships, start by understanding the value of others to form a deeper relationship. Sharing things together will make the relationship deep.

6. A deep relationship is worth much more than hundreds of indifferent relationships

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Making friends is not a bad thing, it just becomes a problem when you don't pay attention to the people you associate with. It was bland and tasteless.

Don't let " lust " want to get rid of loneliness that makes you blind. Choose the right person to make friends, develop deeper relationships and avoid superficial friendships. In any case, everyone deserves real relationships.

See also: 10 types of people you should avoid as far as possible in your life

Having fun!